MAFS Australia is filled to the brim with shocks – it is, after all, a big reason why we love to tune in. And this season has been full of them. The moment when self-proclaimed warrior Ryan dropped Jacqui on the dance floor! When Eliot bailed on Lauren after (checks notes) three days! When Awhina inexplicably wrote “Stay!” When Paul agreed to go on that date! But somehow, no moment has been quite so controversial as when Lauren called out Clint for doing the dishes.
“I come home and instantly know something’s not right,” she said on the couch. “I had to divert my gaze away. I pretty much just shutdown…Clint was doing the dishes.” Note: this is not actually a good thing in Lauren’s world. It’s a sign, she explained, that he wasn’t enough of an alpha.
Even more interestingly? Lauren was not the only one in the group who expressed similar sentiments. Jacqui had early concerns about Ryan when he didn’t “take the lead” by offering her his hand to walk her down the aisle or give her his coat when she was cold. (Ryan also bought his own arguably outdated ideas of manhood. He’s got a sword, for crying out loud.) Sierah seemed completely turned off by Billy’s vulnerability, and instead, gravitated towards Adrian.
For many people watching the show, this glimpse into the world of dating has been nothing short of bizarre. Since when have these ultra traditional, arguably, regressive ideas about relationship gender roles been so normalised? And, even more perplexingly, since when have women been the ones to perpetuate it?
Now, toxic masculinity is nothing new in the world of reality dating shows. We’ve had plenty of examples in MAFS Australia and MAFS UK alike. There was Brad in the UK version last year, who was accused of lovebombing Shona – their dynamic became so unhealthy, they were removed from the show. There was Jack on the last Aussie season, who infamously told another groom to “muzzle your woman” (which, admittedly, he later said he was “pretty ashamed” of).
One might imagine that a man who refused to do any dishes and the laundry, who expected his wife to do all of the housework, who never got too emotional, would fall into a similar category. However, it seems that this is exactly what Lauren was after. And she wouldn’t call it “toxic” at all.
From the very beginning, Lauren made her ideas about the perfect guy pretty clear. She wanted someone who was a high-earner so that she could step back from her business and “serve” him – her words.
While it’s easy to completely dismiss Lauren’s fantasy of a 1950s-style set-up as inherently regressive, perhaps, it’s more interesting to dig into why a more modern, equal arrangement is so unappealing to her.
“For me, the ideal relationship would be a man who is a leader in the relationship in terms of their household and expenses and things,” she explains to us at GLAMOUR.