When I went into my breakup with him, I think it does come across as I might be stepping on Meg’s toes a little bit, but that was not how I saw it because I didn’t know that she was going to end things with him. I knew that she felt hurt. When I say, “You might lose both,” that was not me being like, “She’s going to come in here and break up with you.” It’s me being like, “Hey, you’ve been telling two girls the same thing, and that historically just doesn’t work out well for anyone involved.”
On how they left the “experiment”:
Meg: I made a promise to myself prior to this experience that if I had a feeling I was someone’s number two or default pick I would walk away. If I was looking for a boyfriend I could have possibly stayed, but I was looking for a husband. I could never enter a marriage knowing I was an option to that person.
On what they would have done differently:
Madison: I can’t change anything. What happened happened, and I do accept that a year later and many therapist appointments later. Would I handle it differently now? Totally. Absolutely, I would, but I don’t watch that back and think, Oh, I regret that, or I should have done this. It’s more so.… I could do better. But in that moment, I did the best that I could with the four hours of sleep that I had.
Meg: I wish I would have slowed down, taken a breath, talked slower and painted my toenails. Beyond that, I have no regrets and trust everything that happened was for a reason.
Netflix
On finding closure with Mason:
Madison: I never needed an explanation from anyone. I ran into Mason a month or two ago, and he did apologize to me, and he was like, “Everything that is my responsibility, I fully own that, and I’m sorry that I kind of dragged you through that.” That meant so much to me. I didn’t expect that from him, but it meant a lot to me that he just owned it and apologised.
On what surprised them the most in episodes one to six:
Meg: Oh my God, I was surprised by everything on the show. When I tell you I don’t even remember talking about aliens or conspiracy theories one time, and now that’s my whole personality. Experiencing it first hand, then watching it back knowing it’s put together to be digestible for the public, is very jarring in every way you could imagine.
On how they feel about their journey a year later:
Madison: I think that took me a while to figure out, and a year later I have gotten to just a really good place. The biggest lesson from a situation like this is number one, this isn’t normal. This isn’t a normal thing that people just go through on the daily. There are very few people that can say their worst moments have been televised around the world. So I think that has taught me this radical self-love. I can look at myself in those moments and know that I did the absolute best that I could, and I can accept that version of myself and still love that version of myself.
Meg: There’s not enough words to describe both how wonderful and difficult this journey has been. I have felt the highest highs and lowest lows through this experience. Overall, I am very happy with how life has transpired since the show ended. I have met some of the most incredible humans and have built friendships that will undoubtedly last a lifetime.
These interviews have been lightly edited for length and clarity.
This article originally appeared on GLAMOUR (US).