People talk about wanting to smell attractive, mysterious, alluring etc. with the best perfume, but I like smelling like I’m rich. While many perfume ads sell us the idea of true love (normally featuring a couple frolicking on a beach or in an elevator), my happily ever after is retiring in a mansion in New York, surrounded by diamonds and Pomeranians while my grandchildren try to curry my favour. And I want my perfume to reflect that.
Coming from a fairly modest background, I fantasised about living a wildly glamorous life from a young age and perfume was the perfect entry-point. Spritzing on an intoxicating and glamorous EDP is like slipping into a perfectly fitting couture gown or wrapping myself up in the Max Mara Teddy Coat I’ll never be able to actually afford. In my years as a beauty writer I’ve attended many launches for perfumes that are about evoking a subtle sex appeal, or that help channel your ‘aura’, or fresh scents intended to smell like clean laundry. All very well and good, but you can keep all that. ‘Clean’ or ‘natural’ don’t do it for me—if I’m spending a lot on a perfume, I want to smell every penny of it on my skin.
I’m talking about perfumes that go hard with sparkling aldehydes (the ‘jazz hands’ of fragrance), maybe a sharp twist of Calabrian bergamot, followed by a fanfare of white florals: grubby yet addictive jasmine, Turkish rose notes that swirl around your head and powdery violets that smell like they’ve been plucked from Gloria Swanson’s hat. Washed down with a glug of enveloping vanilla and sandalwood for good measure. Perfume for me is a form of therapy and I want to smell like I’ve been dragged through Joan Collins’ mansion backwards, the notes blaring out like Beyoncé’s horn section.
So where to turn for expensive smells? The perfume world mainly orbits around France and Italy, yet underrated British perfumers and brands tend to do ‘expensive’ rather well. Until recently, the Burlington Arcade in London was once the home of many fancy fragrance boutiques (Roja Parfums is still there) where you could pretend to be one of the very grand ladies that the arcade was originally built for. (Yes, someone built an arcade in the heart of Mayfair purely so that his wife and her friends had somewhere to shop. #relationshipgoals). Head across to the Royal Arcade, you’ll find Ormonde Jayne, whose perfumes use rare and intoxicating ingredients from all corners of the globe. Camden-based Azzi Glasser of The Perfumer’s Story designs smells for Hollywood A-Listers—her scents like Tuscan Suede and Fever 54 evoke the hedonistic glamour of Tinseltown though a British lens. And Olivia Da Costa of Olfactive O has a scent called Skin, designed to blend with your own skin chemistry to create something entirely unique ( a skin scent, if you will), with soft sandalwood, buttery orris and rich vetiver.
Wanting to smell expensive isn’t about being shallow and materialistic—I don’t worship designer labels or lead some debauched, debt-ridden lifestyle à la The Tinder Swindler. But beauty is about glamour and luxury, a fun frivolous world that takes us away from reality. And you don’t even have to spend big to smell expensive, there are plenty of high-street perfumes that smell much more fancy than the price would have you believe.
Ultimately, unlike other beauty products, perfume isn’t about how you look and it isn’t there to make you ‘pretty’. There are no physical prerequisites to wearing the product well—you either smell good or you don’t. And if you smell expensive you’ll immediately feel good, trust me on this. Here are some of the best expensive-smelling scents I swear by…
1. Ormonde Jayne Ormonde Woman
Ormonde Jayne Ormonde Woman Eau de Parfum
This uses an unprecedented amount of black hemlock, which knocks you for six (in a good way) and is like the perfume equivalent of donning a big fat tiara. The founder and perfumer used to create candles for Chanel so she knows a thing or two about smelling expensive.
2. The Perfumer’s Story Tuscan Suede
The Perfumer’s Story Tuscan Suede Eau de Parfum
A heady mixture of jasmine, woods and violet leaf, this scent conjures the Uptown Girls of the hedonistic 80s era: think Jerry Hall, Debbie Harry, Grace Jones and their ilk…
3. Olfactive O Skin
Olfactive O Skin Eau de Parfum
As mentioned above, this is seriously evocative and otherworldly—more ‘synthetic’ than natural, but in the best sense—smelling different on everyone who wears it. It’s like having your own bespoke perfume without having to pay £30k (the going rate for a personalised pong).
4. Superdrug Layering Lab Blossom
Superdrug Layering Lab Blossom Eau de Toilette
Who said smelling expensive came at a price? This clever concoction boasts a femme fatale-worthy bouquet of jasmine and white amber. And while it doesn’t boast the staying power of its pricier counterparts, it’s definitely a pleasure to spritz on throughout the day.
5. Frédéric Malle Eau de Magnolia
Frédéric Malle Eau de Magnolia Eau de Toilette
People bang on about Carnal Flower or Portrait Of A Lady as the ultimate expensive-smelling scents from this cult French brand. But for me, Eau de Magnolia by perfumer Carlos Benaïm is the GOAT. Bringing the glamour in spades it’s also fresh and uplifting for those who aren’t fans of anything too rich or heavy.
6. Penhaligon’s Liquid Love
Penhaligon’s Liquid Love Eau de Parfum
Part of Penhaligon’s new collection channelling the Roaring Twenties (the bottles are to die for), this scent dials up the floral notes to dizzying new heights, bathing you in so many roses you’ll feel like Daisy Buchanan on Valentine’s Day.
7. Floral Street Iris Goddess
Floral Street Iris Goddess Eau de Parfum
Powdery notes of iris and violet get a modern makeover in this little gem of scent, which weaves in rich vanilla accords, as well as an unusual note of chilli pepper that works rather well. (Fun fact: the orris essential oil that creates the iris note is more expensive than gold.)
8. Thameen Insignia
Thameen Insignia Extrait de Parfum
Envisaged by UK-based perfume impresario Christopher Chong, ’Insignia’ is what I’d call “perfume and then some” inspired by the Royal Family’s Garter Star, with posh, princely notes of vetiver, leather and sandalwood.
9. Goutal Paris Eau d’Hadrien
Goutal Paris Eau d’Hadrien Eau de Parfum
Expensive scents don’t have come in all-guns-blazing, take this shimmering, sparkling number—cooked up in 1981 it instantly became a classic, with Sicilian lemon and grapefruit, reminiscent of a weekend in Tuscany.
10. Ellis Brooklyn Salt
Ellis Brooklyn Salt Eau de Parfum
If you aren’t getting enough sun, sea and sand, this perfume is the perfect tonic—conjuring a pleasant day at the beach. Its main salty accord, combined with enveloping sandalwood, musk and Tahitian tiare will have you reaching for your sunhat and strawberry daiquiri.